


Dave's present to Karkat

by HomicideAndGlitter (orphan_account)



Series: Dave and Karkat have a bucket full of adventures [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Adoption, Christmas au (homestuck), Christmas time for the homestucks!, Cute, Dave drops the cool kid facade to be a good fiance, Dave is litterally the best ever, Dirk is Dave's little brother, F/F, Fluff, Gay, Homos, Karkat is the ever emotional shit head, Karkat tells Dave what he really wants, Karkat wants to adopt, Kawaii, M/M, This fic is really weird and I pulled it out of my ass, but this year, human au(homestuck, much love, no lie, why wouldn't he be?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-04-02 02:54:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4043107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/HomicideAndGlitter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is almost Christmas time, and what with all the holiday preparations, Karkat is stressing over Wedding preparations as well. When Dave brings Dirk over to Karkat's place, He finds Karkat in a little rut, absolutely stressed and in tears. But it isn't just the wedding that is stressing Karkat out, nor the holidays. It is a present that Karkat feels is too much to ask for. A child.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dave's present to Karkat

**Author's Note:**

> //w-o-w. This took forever, way longer than it should have*sigh* This is super weird, and I hope you guys are alright with this instalment. Also, I know we just started summer, I just really wanted to write this. Oh, and I was also inspire by a youtube video I watched...I do not own it, and I have no idea how to do links(Nor do I know if you even can do that) But the name of the video and such are in the end notes<3 enjoy~

**Be Karkat Vantas== >**

 

  Your name is KARKAT VANTAS, and you are engaged to the lamest fucking dork in the entire world. You didn’t say you regretted it, though.

  It is almost Christmas time, and not only have you been busy with work, family, and holiday preparations, but _wedding_ preparations, as well. You have everything ready, of course. What kind of tux you will wear, what kind of cake you will cut, and what kind of party you will have before and after the ceremony. You even have the place picked out, the guest lists, and the seating arrangements. The only problem? You don’t have a fucking date. And God knows how much you have been stressing about this.

  None of the dates seem perfect enough! You glare at the mini calendar hanging above your counter, and decidedly check off days you _wouldn’t_ want the wedding on, and reasons as to why you can’t have those dates as well: You are too busy with your shitty part time job, Dave has been babysitting his little brother Dirk recently because Bro keeps going out of town, The place you want is already reserved, you hate Mondays, it will be too hot that day, and _that_ day already has something scheduled!

  Jegus, you can’t catch a break. Ready to cry in frustration, you decide to take a seat at the table and slam your face onto the surface. You are just so fucking close to having everything set up, so close! But no, this whole date issue is hanging above your head and taunting you, just like that weird insurance commercial where the fisherman has a dollar on the end of his hook. Instead of waving a dollar, though, he is unloading a big “fuck you” onto your already full plate. When you think you have a nice date set up, something gets in the way and that old bastard is rubbing it in your face. “Ooh, you almost had it! Gotta be quicker than that!” You groan loudly and proceed to bang your head against the table.

  “Yo Kitkat, I’m back from the store. Did you figure out a date-“ Oh, look. Dave is here. He is standing in the kitchen door way with a bag full of groceries, wondering why the fuck you are trying to commit suicide on your kitchen table. And to top it off? He has a kid attached to his hip. That is probably Dirk, you assume.

**Enough assuming, keep trying to kill yourself.== >**

  “No I didn’t find a date. That is why I am in the process of slamming my God damn skull against the table, in hopes that something with miraculously pop into my cell less think pan. Maybe in the process, I will accidentally kill myself and be led to the other side, where the god of weddings will help me out with the task that no one is fucking helping me with.”

  “Jesus Christ…Good luck with that,” Dave shrugs, drops your grocery bags on the floor, and asks the tiny thirteen year old to help him put shit up. By that moment, you have a fucking migraine and decide that it would be best to quit banging your head on the table.

  “Asshat,” You grumble, and Dirk lets out a quiet laugh.

  “Bro, your fiancé is having major mood swings. Is he pregnant or something?” Dirk asks, shoving a carton of milk into the fridge. Dave snorts.

  “Nah, that’s just Karkat being Karkat. Don’t worry ‘bout it,” Dave mutters. You stay still, just resting on the table with your eyes closed. There is another thing you don’t have planned…well, something you haven’t really talked about to have it planned. You want a kid so fucking badly. Of course, you and Dave can’t just have sex and boom you are pregnant. No, being a male sucks that way. The thing is, you aren’t really sure how Dave would feel if you asked him if you guys could adopt. I mean, yeah, he is great with Dirk, and even better with the twins that Jane and Roxy adopted a couple of months ago. But that doesn’t mean he would actually _want_ any, right?

  Like, yeah, you are still in high school, even though you will be graduating next week (special privilege for some seniors). And you are working a part time job at a day care center, and you aren’t even in college yet! But you have always had this strange motherly instinct or something, even as a small child you knew you wanted to grow and have kids….

  “ _Karkat_!” You jump nearly a foot in the air at Dave’s harsh voice, and you look at him with wide eyes. His aggravated expression switches to one of concern.

  “Are you okay?” You don’t say anything; you just give a curt nod, thank Dirk for helping with the groceries, and walk out of the kitchen. You make a bee line to your bedroom and quietly shut the door when you are alone. You just want to lie down and think. Too much is happening right now, and honestly, your think pan is already really full what with all of this wedding and holiday stuff. You just want to get things sorted out. Maybe it would be best if the wedding isn’t as soon as you want it to be. Perhaps you should go ahead and order the tools and shit online to give to Dirk as a present this year?

  “Karkat? Are you okay?” Or maybe you should tell Dave how strongly you feel about having a kid or two. You didn’t realize you were crying until you sniffled hard before answering with a husky “no.” Dave immediately pushes the door open, closes it behind him, and plops unceremoniously onto the bed. You turn your back to him, not wanting him to see you cry for such a silly reason. He lays a hand on your thigh and pats it comfortingly.

  “Hey, hey, hey. What’s the matter?” You sniffle in response. “Karkat,” He uses a warning filled tone, one that says you better tell him what the fuck is going on or he will smack a bitch.

  “I am just stressed,” You grumble, scowling across the room at your dresser. Dave sighs and lies down beside of you.

  “I know you are, but something else has been troubling you lately. I can tell.” His voice is quiet, and you wonder where Dirk is, glad he can’t hear you guys. You don’t feel comfortable sharing this information with Dave, much less his kid brother. You never keep secrets from Dave, so you suppose it is time to tell him how you feel.

  “Yeah, something has been bothering me,” You admit, and Dave places his hand back on your thigh. You never knew he moved it, but you suppose it doesn’t matter because he moves his arm again to wrap it lazily around your waist.

  “Oh?” You don’t need much to continue.

  “It’s just…I don’t know. I know we aren’t even married yet, or even out of school. I know we haven’t really talked about this sort of thing either.”

  “Uh, I can’t help you out if you won’t even tell me what we are talking about here,” Dave points out, and you growl in answer.

  “I was getting to it, fuckass!” You pause to see if he has anything to say, and when he stays silent, you resume, “I just…I want to be a parent okay? I want to have a kid, maybe two or three, I don’t know! I keep going in to work at the Day Care and I see all of these happy children running to greet their parents at the end of the day. I am kind of jealous to see all those lucky fucking fools hug the tiny life forms. I am sick of knowing that I won’t be able to do that, you know, have a kid. I just _have_ to be born male. I just have to be the unlucky fucker that can’t spit kids out of my fucking non-existent vagina.” You aren’t really sure if anything you said made sense, and you are too distraught to care. You are sure your point was crossed, at the very least. You feel yourself start crying again.

  “Don’t get me wrong, Dave. I am happy with you and I am happy that you will be my husband in the near future…But as stupid as this sounds, I want to be a mom,” You grimace, “err, dad. I guess.” Dave’s silence is over whelming. He is probably really weirded out by everything you just said. He gives you a reassuring pat before pulling you impossibly close.

  “Why didn’t you just say so, dork?” You furrow your brow and hunch in on yourself. “It sounds like you want to adopt, and it sounds like a great idea.” Now you are ashamed, and feel foolish. Tears well up in your eyes and you cry once more. You have been crying a lot here of late.

  “Because I figured you wouldn’t want kids…because, you know…you are too cool for that sort of thing.”

  “I ought to kick your ass!” You flip around to stare at him with wide eyes.

  “What?”

  “Karkat, you are kind of fucking dumb. I love kids, and just because we are barely out of high school doesn’t mean I don’t want any! And what did my letter say to you? I would do anything to make you happy. And my feelings be damned, if you wanted a kid, I would find a way to get you one, even if it killed me,” Dave is over dramatic yet he keeps a serious expression. You are so relieve you collapse on his chest and like the over-emotional cluster fuck you are, you cry. But this time, you have a big smile and you utter quiet “thank yous” Over and over.

  “Are you guys done being weird or do I have to call Pizza Hut by myself?” You are startled out of your tears to find Dirk standing in the door. Just like your fiancé-and all of the other Striders-he crept in here, sneaky, unnoticed, and quietly observing. You give a low growl and chuck a pillow at him. He casually dodges.

  “Not cool,” He mutters. Before you could spew a stream of cuss words (No one- _no one_ -but Dave is allowed to see you cry), Dave also chucks a pillow at him.

  “The one who isn’t cool is you, bro. You know better than to listen in on privet conversations.”

  “Whatever, I was just hungry,” He shrugs,” And it’s none of my business, but I just wanted to say that there is an adoption agency two miles from my school. It is called Sburb home for abandoned kids.” You rise up and give a wide eyed look to the boy with pointy shades.

  “What?” You breathe, and Dirk smirks at you.

  “Yeah. Small adoption fee, you must have a stable home environment, all of that good shit. That’s where Lalonde and Crocker had gotten Caliborn and Calliope. Do you know what the waiting time was for them?” You shake your head. “Just a measly two weeks. This place is a good place, a huge selection. But if you want teenagers, of course you would have to go somewhere else. It is a company that branches off of Spurb, I think. Sgrub? I’m not sure about that place though.”

  And being the emotional guy you are, you leap from the bed and swallow the pre-teen in a big fucking hug. God, you are so glad that Dirk is Dave’s brother and not someone else’s. This kid is pretty fucking great.

**Be Dirk: Hours in the future, but not many== >**

 

  Your name is DIRK STRIDER, and your older brother is really uncool and super romantic. After dining on pizza, he ordered a fucking bouquet of candy red roses and bought a shit ton of chocolate for his fiancé. Like damn, when did he become so uncool? Ah, love. It is weird as shit and you plan on being a player for the rest of your life…of course, not a cheater. That shit is lame and just sick. But you will be one to forever flirt, have one night stands, and never, ever get attached to anyone, even if it is an abnormally kawaii boy by the name of Jake English, who is a year younger than you but at the top of his class. Nope, not even him. Nope.

  Right now, you are watching a weird romantic/horror movie. It is all physiological horror-you know the cliché “I love you so much, I am gonna send you body parts with a note that says ‘from your secret admirer~ heart heart heart heart! :D’” It really isn’t that bad, though. Could use more explosions, sloppy make-outs, or more horse riding. Before you know it, the movie goes off and Karkat kindly offers for you to sleep in his bed while he and Dave crash on the couch. You are pretty sure that he wouldn’t put up an offer like that to anybody but you, so you go ahead and accept it.

  That night, you toss and turn in a foreign bed, foreign room, and foreign house. You wish you had thought to bring Lil Cal with you, but you stupidly left him at home. He would have been somewhat comforting, you think. Maybe you can sneak a quick shower; it is three in the morning so no one will be up. And by quick, you mean three hours. Hey, the norm for you is at least four hours, so you think you are being pretty damn reasonable when you decide that three hours tops would do it for you. So, you hop up and head to the bathroom, successfully stubbing your toe on the door jam. Good job, Asshat. You must be pretty fucking out of it to do something like that. Limping down the hall, you take a sharp right to get into the bathroom when you run into someone who is barely an inch taller than you.

  “Ah, shit man!

  “Fucking god, what the hell!”

  You meet eyes with your brother-to-be and sigh.

  “Sorry,” You grumble. He was wet, which meant he probably just used up most of your precious shower water, and you are undoubtly going to be unable to take that shower anyways. Dave told you that Karkat is especially sentimental or something at night, and you have a feeling that if he has anything on his mind-or believes you may have something on yours-he will never fucking let you leave and he will talk for obnoxious lengths of time. You have heard that his older brother Kankri is worse for it, though. You shudder.

  “What are you doing up, dumb ass? We are  leaving early in the fucking morning!” Karkat demands, putting his hands on his hips. _Wow, he really looks like a disappointed parent when he does that_ , you think. Snickering at your thoughts, you shrug. He gives you a suspicious look.

  “Are you alright?” Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-you will never make it out alive!

  “Yeah, I’m cool-“

  “Here, I can tell you need to talk. Want some hot chocolate?” Abort mission, I repeat, abort mission!

  “No, I am fine, I just-“

  “Nonsense, get your goddamned ass in my kitchen so we can fucking bond, you little shit.” You let out a defeated sigh, realizing that he needed this more than you. You follow him to the kitchen take the seat the grumpy idiot had tried to kill himself in earlier, and rest your head on your palm. Karkat rummages around for the hot chocolate, eventually climbing the counters to get a better look. Then he makes the warm beverage and slides a grey mug to you. Inside the mug, little marshmallows make a grumpy face on top of the creamy brown liquid. Coincidence? You think not; Karkat is super grumpy and angry all the time, so it would only be natural if he shared his grumpiness with everyone else.

**Dirk: Drink that beverage and bond! == >**

  You wouldn’t say that you guys bonded. More like…testing the pros and cons for adopting a kid while still being in high school and being unmarried. He knows it will probably be after Christmas, when he has graduated early, but he also knows it would be best if he and Dave were married and had a bigger house or something to live in. He is now aware of the expenses and the responsibilities of child care(It feels really weird that you, a thirteen year old, are helping him, a nineteen year old, with the responsibilities of being gay and adopting children).

  It is probably five in the morning when you guys have finished talking. He walks back into the living room and slumps on top of Dave, who only wrapped his arm around him and continued to sleep. You walk back to Karkat’s room; now feeling strangely comforted enough to actually get rest. And so you do; you sleep soundly and peacefully. Until you are awoken two hours later by Dave to go to the fucking super mall.

**Be Dave: try to figure out what to buy Karkat for Christmas== >**

 

 You are at the super mall down town with Karkat and Dirk. Karkat is on one end of the store while he shops for all of his friends, and you had snuck off to shop for him. You walk in between the tiny isles in Hot Topic, Spencer’s, and even the fucking Apple technology store. You have gone to most of Karkat’s favorite stores and you still can’t seem to find something perfect for the love of your fucking life.

  “Is this what I have to look forward to when I am old? Fretting over what to get for my loud boyfriend?” Dirk sounds behind you, and you give him a ruthless glare behind your shades.

  “First of all, I am not old. I am fucking seven years older than you, dweeb,” You snarl, and Dirk shrugs before sniffing some perfume from a nearby rack.

  “Could have fooled me,” He mutters. You pretend not to hear him and continue with your sentence.

  “Second. If you have a problem with Karkat, fucking tell me,” Dirk whips his head back at you, showing momentary surprise.

  “Whoa, man. I am not saying anything bad about him. He’s cool,” Dirk offers. You snort and prowl through the shelves and isles.  You soon turn on your heel and walk out of this store and across the wide halls to the next. Now, he follows silently behind, holding a bottle of perfume or something that he better had payed for.

  “I have an idea of what you could do for Karkat,” He mutters behind you. You stay quiet, and he continues. “Yeah, get him a small present here, but take him somewhere for the big present.”

  “Like where?” You scoff, looking through the clothes racks. Maybe he would like a new plushy from build-a-bear? You could make him a crab one….

 “I have just the place.” You turn to Dirk with suspicion, and he has a shit eating grin plastered to his cheeks. You raise a brow.

**Be Karkat: Christmas Day== >**

 

  It has been two weeks since the last shopping trip, and you really fucking hope that the things you have bought and ordered are suitable enough gifts for everyone. All of your friends had spent this Christmas over at the Peixes’, since they have a fucking mansion and a huge ass Christmas tree to litter presents under. Seriously, there were at least two hundred presents, maybe more. Well, there was.

   Everyone is now holding their gifts dear to them, even the shitty ones you had given, and everyone iss singing or chatting, laughing or dancing around the living area. You are actually quite happy with this Christmases outcome. Dave seemed to love his gift, and you adore the stuffed crab he had made for you. You actually thought everything was going great until Dave said you both are leaving.

  He promised you that you both would come back to hang out with the family and friends, so you agree and curiously walk out to the car with him. You can’t say you weren’t a bit worried when he blind-folded you with an old green bandanna, but you trust him and decide to let him take you wherever. You seriously doubt he is going somewhere to kill you and dump your body in a lake, no matter how much this situation reminded you of that movie you watched a couple of weeks ago.

  You are getting antsy, and a bit aggravated with the constant Christmas music, but you stay calm when Dave holds your hand and cheekily sings along to “All I want for Christmas” by whoever the fuck it is by.  Then, the car stops for good. Dave tells you to stay seated and blind. He climbs out of the car, opens your door, and leads you somewhere. You walk up steps and into a warm building. There are the sounds of people talking and children laughing. The curious sounds of computers whirring and the smell of an elementary schooler’s lunch box. Where the fuck are you? The Day Care center?

  “Dave Strider?” A cheery male voice asks. You so badly want to peek, but Dave has wrapped his arms around your shoulders as he stands behind you.

  “That’s me~” Dave sounds more peppy, brighter than usual. You are becoming irritated, that is until the other man asks you guys to follow him. As you walk, the man and Dave have a polite, business like conversation and you stay silent as if you aren’t there.

  “We have all of your paper work filled out and put into the system. The you-know-what that you picked last Friday is just down the hall.” The what?

  “Good. I’m still sorry we can’t take the gift home with us yet. What with high school-“

  “No, sir! It is fine! And until you are ready, know that you are allowed to visit anytime just like today.” Now you have a sneaking suspicion as to what the gift could be, even with the two talking about it in a way so you wouldn’t know. Your heart beat speeds up and you find yourself bouncing on your toes as your small party reaches what is apparently a door.

  “Hi, Melissa,” The man greets warmly, and an adult woman greets him back just as kindly. The door is shut behind you. You are really anxious now.

  “Okay, I can take the blind fold off, now,” Dave whispers, and you close your eyes behind the thin cloth. He unknots it and it falls from your face. You are scared to open your eyes. “Merry Christmas.” With a deep breath you open your eyes.

  You burst into tears and walk forward. You fall on your knees in front of your “gift”, a toddler with white hair and intense brown eyes.

  “We can’t take him home yet, but he is ours now. His name is Henry. I think we should call him Hal for short.” Dave rambles on and on about the quiet kid infront of you, but you don’t really hear him. You have never felt so relieved and greatful in your life. Surrounded by building blocks and stuffed animals, the little kid stands staring at you with curiosity and suppressed delight. He reaches out his little chubby fingers and wipes a tear from your cheek.

  You turn your attention to the girl named Melissa, a black girl with a heart shaped face and the sweetest fucking smile. She looks down at you happily, and nods at your unspoken question. You grin gratefully and turn back to Henry-or Hal, as Dave calls him-and slowly hold out your arms as if he would run away if you made sudden movements. He does just the opposite and falls into your arms, and you have never felt anything sweeter than hugging this kid. You reserve hugs for only Dave, because you strongly dislike everyone…but you know you can spare a few for this kid right here.

  You have to bring him back to Sburb, but Melissa and the man whose name you never learned said you could spend Christmas with Hal, and you did just that. The lenient Orphanage allows you to walk out of the building with the kid, letting you borrow a car seat and everything. You show off your kid ( _Your_ kid!) to all of your friends and family back at the Peixes’ place. Everyone expresses great love for him, and Dirk actually whips out an extra pair of small, pointy anime shades to the kid. The three year old slips the sunglasses on and fist bumps Dirk before becoming a giggling mess and running back to you. He pridefully shows you the sunglasses and even though you think that style of shades is really weird, you smile and tell him he looks great, and he does.

  You go shopping with Dave for Hal, letting him pick out whatever toys he wanted. You spend your entire Christmas bonus on him at the store, and also at a McDonalds, which no one seemed to mind. Hal quietly proved himself to you and Dave by eating his entire happy meal, so Dave buys him a blueberry muffin. You aren’t even sad when you had to take him back to the orphanage, because just knowing that he is yours and yours only, set you at ease.

   And when you get home, You ask Dave to spend the night with you since Dirk had went home two days ago, and you both have a casual and Romantic evening, one that of course ended with you two in bed together, but that isn’t the point. The point is, you wanted to show Dave how much you loved him, and appreciated the ‘gift’. That night when you are snuggled up next to Dave, wearing his shirt and boxers while watching a Christmas special rerun on your TV, you kiss him and tell him how much you have enjoyed this Christmas with him. He keeps surprising you in the most wonderful ways, and you can’t get over how sweet and perfect he is being, dropping his cool kid façade just for you.

  This has been the best Christmas ever, and you have spent it with the people you love dearly, now adding a new member to the equation. For once in your life, you can say that you are happy and complete in every way.

**Author's Note:**

> //Whew, did that suck or did that suck? Anyways, the video is "Male Trolls Sing: All I want For Christmas Is You" And I am pretty sure the video was uploaded by Emerald Blaise Luxembourger. It is litterally the cutest thing and I cry happy tears every time I watch it...It is that cute<3 Anyways, I love you all, have an amzing Day/summer/Christmas/Kawanza/other holidays I don't know>-> Lol, Stay perfect, my purple bumblebees. HG out~


End file.
